How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf

How to Flirt with a Naked Werewolf is a hilariously funny (if unnecessarily dirty) take on the paranormal romance genre. If you are a fan of Twilight and Sookie Stackhouse and the like, and you don't mind reading (or skimming past) some explicit scenes, I highly recommend this book. Oh, but you need a sense of humor, because your beloved series is going to have egg all over its face...

We start with Mo. Mo was raised by hippies, tried to become a yuppie, and now has moved herself to Alaska to try and figure out who she really is. She's in her early thirties, tall, pretty and has a tiny bit of a temper problem. She has to look like she has an outdoorsy-nature-loving side, but also like she's at home in a big city, too. In the instant that Mo's face was described, I saw Liv Tyler and never looked back.

Evie is Mo's first friend (and boss) in Grundy, AK. She's a little bit older, obviously small town, and just the sweetest little thing ever. I couldn't get Connie Ray out of my head. This is a really old picture, but it gives you a better idea of the back-woods-small-town-darling look:

Buzz is Evie's husband, and he's a bit older than she is, he's gruff, prideful and has a trademark buzz-cut. I don't know a lot of guys that can pull off gruff and prideful quite as well as Brian Dennehy 

Cooper is the super-hot jerk that Mo (of course) falls in love with immediately. The fact that he's a werewolf is just a non-issue. He's animalistic, with severe territory issues, super-sex-skills and a weirdly attractive body odor. He's a jerk most of the time, and Mo is completely turned on by the bad-boy vibe that he's constantly throwing off. He actually picks her up and slings her over his shoulder, cave-man style, and she loves it. I can't think of anybody more suited to a bad-boy-werewolf than Colin Farrell

Seriously. Is there anybody hotter who looks like he could just wind up in a fight on any given day?

OK. Well... yes. But that's already been done.


(And yes, I will find just about any excuse to put a Hugh Jackman Wolverine pic up. Rawr.)

Maggie is Cooper's little sister. She's also inherited the family traits: anger issues, territorialness, and the ability to morph into a wolf at will. Somebody like Cobie Smulders looks like she could tear your head off, but then be sweet baby sister, too, yes?

Now, one of the two following characters (Samson or Eli) was so minor that I almost thought he could have been discarded entirely. I figured he was the all too common novel-to-movie castoff. When whittling down the cast to those most memorable for viewing purposes, somebody gets cut, and any lines they had get divvied up between the remaining characters or lost completely.

I'm not going to tell you which one it was I thought could be cut... I'll just tell you that he turns out to be really, really important. Really.

Samson is one of Cooper's brothers. He's big and smiley and one of those guys who thinks he's God's gift to women. He's charming and a bit on the smarmy side, but funny and easy to hang around anyway. Somebody like Alan Ritchson (Just color his hair dark... it will be fine. Don't worry)

Eli is another of Cooper's brothers. He's the sweet one, the one who wants to help Mo be part of the family, but also realizes that sometimes Cooper is a giant jerk-face and that maybe she'd be better of without him. Somebody you kind of wish was your best friend. Like Jake Gyllenhaal 

And, just because it's funny: Leonard is this pervy guy in town who keeps asking Mo to come over and hang out in his "home rigged hot tub" I can't help but picture Steve Buscemi

sitting in one of these:

How's that for a mental picture??? You wish I had ended on Colin Farrell, eh? Well, here's a palette-cleanser:

The Goddess Test

The Goddess Test is a cute new YA book about Kate and her attempt to be a goddess and prolong her time with her dying mother. It's nothing earth-shattering, but it's a fun, light read that can probably make just about anybody smile: it's a modern day fairy tale and I loved it. 

Kate was raised in New York City by her mother. Now they have moved to Eden, Michigan as her mother lives out her last days. Kate eventually enters into a bargain with Hades, and has to pass a number of tests in order to attain her goddesshood (spell-check is telling me that's not a word? WHY? "godhood" is a word. Why not "goddesshood"? Word-makers are misogynists.)

Anyway. Kate has to be believable as a plain-Jane type of girl, believable as a potential Goddess and be able to convince us that she actually cares about the people around her. This actress was suggested to me by a friend for another book/cast, and I've been patiently waiting until I could find a place for her, and I believe I have found it. I pick Malese Jow

Diana (Kate's Mother) is dying of cancer, and has been gravely ill for four years. Now, however, through the power of Hades' bargain, she is healthy and vivacious in Kate's subconscious, and we need somebody who can manage the mystique and the power of this motherly character. Oh, and she needs to resemble Kate a fair bit. I pick Monica Belucci

Ava is your run-of-the-mill popular-girl-b-word. She's stuck up and vapid and self-centered. Until she dies. Then she hovers in the gateway to the underworld with Kate and the two become friends. Somebody like Amber Heard would do well here.

James is an averagely awkward adolescent. He's goofy, but kind and open-minded. Eventually, though, he needs to be believable as something more, and I think somebody like Kevin McHale would be versatile enough to pull this off.

Calliope is one of Kate's handmaids when she is living in the gateway to the underworld. She's centuries old, smart, bubbly and super helpful. A little too helpful, if you know what I mean *eyebrow waggling* I pick  Olivia Hack

Ella is another of Kate's handmaids, and she's a little more... passionate. Passionate about everything. She's quick to anger, quick to judge, proud, haughty, and desperately devoted to those she loves. She's also centuries old, and a timeless beauty. I think of a girl much like Alexandra Daddario

And now we come to Hades. Or, as he is known in this story: Henry.

I know, right? "Henry"? That's the "modern" name that the nearly omnipotent, all-powerful Hades came up with as a moniker for the twenty first century? Whatever, dude, it's your life. Er... afterlife. You know what I mean.

Henry is typical tall, dark and handsome. He's moody and broody. He's clever and friendly, but guards his feelings very closely. He is responsible for this goddess test that is being administered, and he has watched dozens of girls die in their attempt of it. He feels guilty and powerless to protect those that he is most responsible for. Did I mention he's handsome? And charming?

 Let's see... handsome, timeless, exotic, moody... that can only mean Ben Barnes

Rawr. 

You can read my review of this book on Goodreads.

Torment

Torment is the sequel to Lauren Kate's Fallen, and while many of the same old characters are here, we do meet some new people. 

Shelby is Luce's roommate at her new school. She's a typical-looking California girl: tall, thin, blond, bendy (she's a yoga fanatic) and pretty. She has a bit of a mean girl exterior, but inside is a pretty good friend. Somebody a lot like Meaghen Martin would fit well here.

Miles is the nice boy. You know, the one who tells you the truth and doesn't treat you like a child. He's friendly and sweet and cute, but in a totally non-threatening, un-dangerous kind of way. Kind of like Finn Jones.

Francesca is one of Luce's new teachers. She's a fallen angel, and has a timeless, powerful sort of beauty. She's intelligent and completely able to take care of herself, but she has a flaw... she's in love with a demon. Ellen Barkin is one of those women who is beautiful, but looks like she has a take-no-prisoners philosophy.

Steven is the demon that Francesca loves. He, too, is timeless, powerful and classically good-looking. Described as a devilishly handsome man with salt and pepper hair, Richard Gere could do very, very well here.

Guest Post: The Vampire Academy part 2

Before you get too far into this, make sure you've seen the first half of Lissa's fantasy cast for this vampire series. 

Eddie Castile, dhampir, a less major character but with important recurring roles, to me always seemed like this big butch of a guy with an amazing strong jaw and a wicked smile. Darren Criss hit the spot. He’s like everyone’s male BFF. Don’t you just feel comforted knowing he’s got your back?

We don’t meet Sydney Sage until later in the series, and I don’t want to give away spoilers on her role, so suffice to say that the perfectly human Sydney should be portrayed by Emily Browning, who, you may remember, played Violet Beaudelaire in A Series of Unfortunate Events. The only picture I could find of a blonde Browning was for her upcoming film, Sucker Punch. However, I think it highlights some important points about Sydney (no spoilers!)

Victor Dashkov, Lissa’s uncle. I can’t really say anything at all without giving away spoilers, so suffice to say, he’s an evil bastard who has to be able to pull off being nice, and very, very manipulative. He has to age from about 40 to 70 over the space of the series due to a degenerative disease. It was very hard finding the right actor to fill this role, but I decided on Christopher Walken – because he can pull off being a graceful Moroi, and we know he can be a total dick, totally creepy, and also totally awesome.

Rose’s mother, Janine, is revealed to be a red-haired Scottish woman, and one of the most deadly female Guardians the Academy ever produced. Now we know where Rose gets it from. I know I could have cast any woman around age 40 for this, hair colour and accent be damned, but I just can’t get the businesswoman image of Julianne Moore out of my head. She’s got the whole I’m-in-charge-who-cares-if-I’m-a-woman thing going on. And she’s still pretty hot for a 50 year old.

Abe… Abe… what can I say about Abe? the mysterious Turkish patriarch who always dressed outlandishly like a pimp. Someone tall, gorgeous, yet middle-aged a swarthy… someone who can beat the crap out of you and romance you the next minute… who else but Hugh Jackman?

Another minor but important and recurring role is Tasha Ozera, Christian’s aunt, and the unfortunate victim of his parent’s descent to the dark side. Tasha is a beautiful Moroi, strong and opinionated, and carries the scars of her betrayal. As soon as I saw a picture of Zooey Deschanel raven-haired and blue-eyed, I fell in love with the idea of her playing Tasha. If no one else in my fantasy cast is used in the film, I hope most for her casting. She looks perfect.

And last but not least, Jill Mastrano, the wide-eyed fourteen year old Moroi who falls in love with the idea of fighting for herself alongside the Guardians. Affectionately known to the others as ‘Jailbait’, Jill has to be tall and gangly in that awkward teenage phase, to then grow up and become more womanly later in the series. She also has to bear a certain resemblance to someone in particular. I’ve chosen Samantha Hanratty.

That’s all for now. So what are your ideas? Love it? Hate it? Who would you prefer? Got any extra castings I should have mentioned?

Note from Gina: Thank you, Lissa, for putting together this fabulous fantasy cast! Anybody who puts Hugh Jackman in anything is A-OK in my book ;)

Guest Post: The Vampire Academy

Hi there– I’m Lissa from Take Me With You, the story of an Aussie expat living in the UK after a three year long distance relationship. Gina has graciously agreed to let me guest blog about one of the Young Adult books series I feel most passionate about: Richelle Mead’s Vampire Academy. 


It’s not your typical Twilight fare. Our young heroine, seventeen year old Rose Hathaway, is a dhampir, a vampire half-breed , training to be a Guardian at St Vladamir’s Academy. Her best friend Vasilisa “Lissa” (same name as me, I know, how totally cool!) Dragomir is a Moroi (good elemental-magic wielding vampires) Princess, and always needs to be protected from the Strigoi, the red-eyed evil vampires who hunt them down. Rose is a total kick-ass heroine who falls into temptation with her god-like Siberian tutor, Dimitri Belikov. Throughout the series, we watch Rose struggle with her forbidden romance and the torturous notion of having to choose between her BFF and the man she loves.

Now, when it comes to casting, these roles are pretty tricky, as there is already a VA movie in pre-pre-production. The majority of the characters are teenagers. I’ve chosen actors that I think look the role, regardless of age. Sometimes we’ll just have to pretend they’re the right age. Also, I think it should be mentioned that there is a big physical difference between the Moroi and their dhampir Guardians: Moroi are always tall and thin and delicate-looking, and could pull off being supermodels – the dhampirs are stockier/curvier, stronger, trained to be bodyguards, and look more like normal people.

It was always going to be hard to choose an actress to portray Rose, as the general consensus from the VA community is that we want someone brunette who is beautiful yet normal-looking, who can pull of the action, and also deliver the friendship with Lissa and the smouldering sensuality with Dimitri. Megan Fox is thrown around a bit, but once I saw Odette Yustman, I knew that no one else could ever be my Rose. Although I haven’t seen her act in anything, she looks exactly as I pictured Rose in my head. She is currently 25 years old: Rose is 17.

Rose’s BFF Lissa is another very careful casting choice. Throughout the series we are told that Lissa is tall and beautiful with blonde hair and jade-green eyes: and she is so delicate-looking that you feel compelled to protect her. I saw Kirsten Prout in Kyle XY, and while reading the series, she was always my Lissa. She gives off the perfectly innocent girl-next-door vibe. She is currently 20 years old. Lissa is 17.

The biggest debate in the VA community is who may be cast as Dimitri in the upcoming film. The debate mostly rages between Ben Barnes and Taylor Kitsch. But Dimitri is a dhampir, and a senior Guardian, and is supposed to be about 6’6” or thereabouts. So casting needs to consider someone who has the body and the chiselled facial features we all know and love. My choice is Daniel Cudmore. I first saw him as Colossus in X-Men II, and then as Felix in the Twilight Saga. He’s an enormous, gorgeous hunk of a man, and with his long hair, he’s my Dimitri through and through. He is currently 29: Dimitri is 24.

The next most important character is Lissa’s Moroi boyfriend, Christian Ozera. Christian is stylised as a bit of an emo rebel, because his parents willingly turned Strigoi. He’s an outcast, but his connection to Lissa is undeniable. With black hair and blue eyes, as soon as I saw a picture of Adam Gregory, I knew that he was my Christian.

Next is bad boy Adrian Ivashkov, the drinking, smoking, and loyal Moroi ally to the girls throughout the series. He’s a hard one to cast, because I wanted someone heartbreakingly good-looking, but still with that rough kind of appearance: a bit of a James Dean rebel to offset Christian’s emo. With the Dimitri debate now settled by my casting of Daniel Cudmore, that leaves Ben Barnes free to play Adrian.

Mason Ashford, Rose’s good dhampir friend and kind of love interest early on in the series, is next. I can’t remember if anyone ever described him as a ginger, but I saw someone else hypothesise Rupert Grint, and I think it’s an adorable choice. He’s tall and gangly and would just be totally awesome. He has a sort of innocence to his appearance, but I bet he can kick butt as well.  And you need a token ginger, don’t you?

Mia Rinaldi, Moroi,  is a complex character. I don’t want to give away spoilers for the rest of the series, but in the early books she’s a total bitch. She declares war on Rose and Lissa for personal reasons, and ends up on the receiving end of one of Rose’s punches – which is one of my favourite scenes. Described as baby faced and tiny, looking like a porcelain doll complete with blonde ringlets, the actress with the perfect face for the role, to me, is Amanda Seyfried. She’s way too old to be playing a 16 year old, but in my fantasy cast she’s the right age.

After a three-year long-distance relationship, my fiancée and I are finally living on the same continent, in the same house. Take Me With You is an honest blog about an Aussie in England and all the things I'm learning on my journey, uprooted to the other side of the world and far out of my comfort zone to be with the love of my life.

 

Gunslinger

I finally finished The Gunslinger, the first book in Stephen King's magnum opus, The Dark Tower. I have to admit... I was underwhelmed.

However, I have heard excellent things about the series as a whole, so if you have it in you to convince me to keep reading, I'm all ears. This was my first King novel ever, and at this point, I've given up on the man, honestly. Color me unimpressed.

Anyway, this book is being made into a movie, or rather, the whole series has been sold to the Hollywood powers that be, and this book is the first one up. I actually think this will make a decent movie- the 264 page book had what I thought amounted to about 180 pages of genuine story, so nothing worthwhile will get cut. There's a lot of chance for action, and we all know that enough action can make you forget that there's no substance to the story, right?

There's really only a handful of characters, and all but one we only see briefly. Before we get started let me set the tone for you: this books is basically a post-apocalyptic western fantasy horror story. So... creepy. Creepy is the vibe you should be getting.

First, Alice. Or Allie. Depending on what page we're on, she's referred to by both names an equal number of times (like that's not confusing...). She's a barmaid in a dusty old town, and she's willing to sleep with a customer she just met. I sort of get the feeling that life's handed her a difficult hand, and that's she's "past her prime" if you know what I mean. I cannot get Catherine O'Hara out of my head.

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In a set of flashbacks, we see the Gunslinger's instructor. He's a small, angry man who teaches all the potential gunslingers how to be ruthless warriors. We don't really know what they're warring against, but they're preparing and training nonetheless. This man is ruthless and calculating; I mean he's training pubescent boys to be cold killers for crying out loud! There's something... I don't know? Malicious? around Michael Sheen's eyes that makes me think he could do something like this.

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 We also meet Jake. Jake is a 10 (ish) year old boy who accompanies the Gunslinger. For what purpose, I know not, but he's there. He's incredibly innocent and weird. He comes from another point in the time space continuum/ parallel dimension/ world/ universe... we don't really know at this point. The point is: he's in an alien environment for an unknown reason to accompany a stranger on an unknown and mysterious task. Got it? It's such a heavy role and the kid is so young, that this would go to an unknown. Somebody like Haley Joel Osment in Sixth Sense... but HJO is way to old now (you wanna feel old- he's 22. Old enough to be out of college) But somebody like that.

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The Man in Black is being pursued throughout the story. He pops up occasionally and shows his face from time to time. He's the villain, I guess, although I think the Gunslinger is fighting his personal demons more so than any outside force. This Man in Black is curt, brazen and ought to strike you as villainous. Alfred Molina. 

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Now for the Gunslinger himself. Since he really is the only character in the story, and he's in every single scene, this can go to a really big name, heavyweight type of actor. He's gotta be rugged and tough and (let's face it) handsome. He's struggling with who he is and what he's doing. He is filled with self-loathing for the things he's done and he's been responsible for. At the same time, he is filled with a disarming sense of purpose; he will reach the Dark Tower, no matter who he has to hurt or kill or destroy or leave behind in the process. The dichotomy of his psyche will be difficult to play, and needs to go to somebody with some serious chops. I have three choices, all of which I think are viable in their own way.

First, my top choice, is Brad Pitt. He would be a sympathetic Gunslinger; focusing on the self-loathing side. He knows that what he is doing is for the greater good (whatever that means in this story) but he hates that he has to do it this way. He's capable of love and affection, but barges on regardless in pursuit of his goals.

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Second, is Leonardo DiCaprio. You might hate to admit this, but the man has come a long, long way since the Romeo + Juliet and Titanic days. He's burgeoning into one of the greatest actors of this generation, and he's shown his grit more than once, to great effect. I think DiCaprio's Gunslinger would be more ruthless, more cold. There would be little remorse for his despicable actions, and it would be fleeting. He's single minded in his pursuit, and nothing and nobody else matters.

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And my third pick, Johnny Depp. Depp's Gunslinger would be the more psychotic version. In the book, you get the sense that he may not even know why he's pursuing the man in black; he knows he wants to find the Dark Tower, but he's not even certain of that. He definitely changes his MO more than once, and he's proven his ability to react on pure, self-preserving instinct. His pursuit is a mindless one; he pursues because he must.

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All three of these men are heralded as being fantastic actors, and I genuinely believe that any one of them could pull off this role and do it with panache. It all depends on the direction the director wants to go with it, and any of these portrayals would be entertaining and intriguing. I really did picture all three of them at different times, depending on what the story was doing at the time. The Gunslinger's face in my head changed a lot :) I also pictured Dennis Quaid from time to time... but I think he's too much of a "nice guy" to take on something so dark and sinister as this.



Please post your ideas in the comments- whether you agree with me or not!
You can read my review of this book on Goodreads.com

Buffy Reboot

If you are a Buffy fanatic, I suggest you stop reading now, because I will be discussing who I think would make a good Buffy in the new Whedon-less reboot.

Let the gnashing and wailing happen someplace else, because I think this will be fun.

I know that Whedon is the backbone of the franchise, but let's be honest: Buffy ran on television for seven seasons, twelve if you count the five seasons of Angel. This franchise has one of the most devoted fan followings ever, and the woman who pitched this and is taking charge of the reboot is a loyal Buffy denizen. A loyal Batman fan took over the franchise and raised it to new heights, why can't it be done for Buffy?

Oh, and lest we forget it was an awesomely bad movie before it was a dark and sinister television series. (emphasis on awesome)

I'm on board, so long as casting choices are made intelligently.

This time around, they're not going to look at Buffy in high school, but rather as an adult and in more adult situations (there are only so many locker room and library fight scenes you can dream up, right?) so the age range for Buffy is blown wide open, although we all know she's going to be on the youngish side and extraordinarily gorgeous, because that's how Hollywood rolls, right?

So, my number one choice in my fantasy cast for Buffy is Kristen Bell. This name is being batted around a lot, and I really like it. One, I like Kristen Bell. I think she's feisty. There's also something sharp about her, and I think Heroes only grazed the surface of her abilities (it's not that rom-coms have really stretched her, you know?)

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There's a lot of interest out there in Amanda Seyfried, though I cannot imagine where it comes from. Maybe because the Red Riding Hood reboot is more gory than we all expected? I don't know. I'm not holding my breath for her to be a big action star now, in any case...

If we're leaning toward something edgier and darker, I like Emma Stone. Though the blond cheerleader look is pretty important, and I don't know how she would look blond. Some people just can't handle it, you know? ;)

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One more name to think about it Yvonne Strahovski. I know she's pretty busy with Chuck, but she's fantastic at the kicking butt thing. And let's face it, she is gorgeous, and Buffy is supposed to be so disarmingly pretty that nobody thinks she can even defend herself. I know this is in a slightly different direction than Buffy normally goes, but this kind of satire is hard to pull off:

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And yet Strahovski does it very, very well.

So, those are my three picks for Buffy in the new reboot. Who do you want to see? And please, don't bother telling me that you don't want to see it, it's getting done whether we're on board or not, so let's have some fun with it, shall we?



Please post your ideas in the comments- whether you agree with me or not!